I am not a knitter.

As I wove my frosty way through the crowd of hurried students, all intent on their next classroom and the the texts they'd just received, I looked up from my cold-chapped knuckles to see a beautiful blue hat come through the crowd. Knit in chunky wool, just slouchy enough, I envied the girl whose head it adorned - she looked so warm! I decided then and there to learn how to knit, so that I, too, could have a chunky woolen hat - without having to pay $30 for it.
Turns out, I am not a good knitter. I am easily distracted, impatient with tedium, and my neck tires easily from peering down at tiny stitches. The scarf I'm working on is only half an inch long and I can already tell it's ugly, a lumpy, purple tangle. Not even an angry knitter, as some identify, I lost all interest after two weeks - just long enough to have eagerly bought $50 in salvaged yarn, all of which is now sitting in a pile in the corner of my bedroom - just a big bag of too-big thrift store sweaters that I'll never wear.
I guess I should have just bought the damn hat.

Open Side-Tie

Ladderback

Triple Crossweave

This is a fantastic way to re-size a too-big t-shirt and make it look incredible in the process! No sewing required, just some scissors, a shirt, and some patience.